Yesterday, over the course of 10 hours, we drank 5 bottles of bai jiu and a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. And felt fantastic. I know it seems like we drink a lot but…that’s because we do. Drinking in China is arguably more important than speaking the Chinese language, especially if you don’t speak the Chinese language. In fact, it is a language all its own. If someone tells you drinking doesn’t matter I would say that they are either 1. ignorant or 2. ignorant. Doing business or connecting in China without drinking is like turning door knobs without a thumb - it can be done, but

inefficiently and very awkwardly.

So, some tips for those of you ready to jump head first into the performing arts.

1. Fat is your friend. It absorbs alcohol. The meal will start with a toast. Your stomach is probably empty, so if you’re not used to drinking you may feel a little warm. No problem. That’s like the first injection of gasoline into an engine. Start me up, baby! I digress. The next matter of order is to layer your stomach with enough fat/meat for the blitzkrieg of toasting that is about to commence a few minutes later. Don’t be shy. Go for it. Also, the lining of the cow’s, pig’s, etc. stomach/intestines is your good friend.

2. Don’t mix bai jiu with Soy Milk, Juice, Soda, or other beverages served. It’s tempting because they counteract that God awful taste (see #3 below), but the result is serious, something from your 10th grade chemistry class. The only exception is tea. But don’t drink too much. Just sip, baby!

3. Don’t taste. I had an awful gag reflex to bai jiu before I learned that it ain’t meant to be enjoyed going down. Fling it to the back of your throat and swallow quickly. Don’t let it hit your tongue. This will increase your drinking capacity 3-4 fold.

4. Use the small cups. They allow you to do #3. If you drink from a regular glass you will taste more than you want. Avoid use of such cups when possible.

5. After finishing the bai jiu someone will likely suggest ordering beer. As tempted as you are to trade in for that familiar taste…don’t do it. You’ll likely have no say in the matter, though. Just be careful. It will fill you up and spit you inside out! If you really want to take my advice, just go on about how much you love Chinese bai jiu and would like to drink one more bottle.

6. If you are in a private room with more than one table and you know there is a guy that has taken a liking to you and likes to drink with you, do not do anything to draw attention to yourself. Not only will he call you over to drink with him, but also a couple times with his associates. That means, and I say this from experience, don’t stand up to go to the bathroom unless you really have to.

7. There is no shame in throwing up. It’s like hitting the “refresh” button on a slow loading web page. A few moments later and you’re ready to go.

8. Be careful of women. They are like little mercenaries sent to kill you softly. Seriously, guys bring girls just to make you drunk. How? Well, they will either 1. drink juice while you drink fire water or 2. drink a sip while you drink the entire cup. How can they get away with this? Well, for one, they are beautiful. And they smile, pout, shout, and then tell you how amazing you are after you drank that entire cup.

You’ll likely encounter these women when dealing with the under 40 year old business men. The older guys (40+) will likely not have women with them. If they do, it will be their wife, whom is almost certainly not a crazy mercenary drinker. You should toast her out of respect. It doesn’t matter what or how much she drinks. You drink alcohol and drink it all. She probably won’t toast you back.

In dealing with the young ones, just stand your ground. Smile, say something witty and, if your me, flirt.

9. Smile. When done properly, it can make folks drunker than any amount of alcohol.

And some etiquette…

If the relationship is not yours or introduction being made on your behalf, allow the “leader” on your side to initiate the first round of toast, then follow in order of your side’s ranking.

Toast the highest ranking person first, then work your way around. They will, in turn, toast you. Just remember, the amount you’ll have to drink will be the number of people x 2 (plus some for good measure), so pace yourself.

With the exception of the first and last toast, drinking is almost always done 1 on 1. Don’t try to be efficient and kill two birds with one stone. That is not taken well.Stand up. But let the higher ranking person, especially the older guys sit. Actually, make them sit. When it comes to the younger guys, though, I think it is better to go toe to toe.
When you toast, be sure to place your cup at a lower level than your counterpart (if he/she is of a higher rank). If they try to go lower, you go lower. Go to the table and if you are good friends (but not anyone else) and want to be drunk and stupid, the floor.

Hold your glass with two hands no matter how small it is. One hand underneath and the other as you would normally hold a glass. Note: this is super formal and not many people do it.

干杯 (ganbei) means “dry cup”. Drink it all. That means every last drop. And make sure your counterpart does too. If he/she doesn’t, don’t be afraid to call his/her bluff…unless that person is of a higher rank than you, a new relationship, etc. If you really want to be respectful you can tell that person to drink as they please even though you are going to drink a full cup.

An experienced drinker always has a cup in one hand and the bottle in the other when he is making his rounds round the table. Refill the glass of your counterpart before your own.

If someone is refilling your glass, hold it with at least one hand (two is more formal). If it is sitting on the table, tap your middle and index couple fingers twice on the table as a way to say “thank you”. Or at least sit upright and put a hand on your glass while they pour to show your paying attention and don’t regard their effort as that of a waiting staff.
Do not “accidentally” spill alcohol. That’s weak and totally not cool. If you really are to your limit, then just smile and say “In a moment” or “I have to take a rest”.

As I wrote “highest ranking” it felt weird. It’s not as hierarchical as it may sound. The atmosphere is actually very casual. But to be clear higher rank = this guy is significantly older than me, is the richest guy, the boss, the birthday girl, or just the person who is paying the bill that day. That person will likely have the power seat, the one farthest from and facing the door.

People will say and do a lot to test you. But it’s only that, a test. One reason is to see how much you can drink. The other is to measure your capacity to listen to sometimes completely absurd bullshit. But it’s basically like a kid tapping on the cage of a snake. Don’t take anything, good or bad, too personal. Always keep in mind the person who brought you into that relationship. That is your main priority, to make him/her look like they made a good judgment.

That said, you also don’t want to be a show pony. For this reason, I often don’t initiate toasts with people unless the relationship is really important or I am already close to them. And even when I receive a toast, I don’t always return it. I can get away with this because people just figure I don’t know the SOP. Use your professional judgment. Drinking in China, like many things here, is a performing art, but you must maintain a sense of self-respect. Don’t lose yourself in the character. Some say don’t play one at all.

Especially for Americans, Japanese, and Koreans, always remember that no matter the name you introduce yourself as, whether it be the one your parents gave you or the corny one you made up with other foreigners in your Chinese class, you are not yourself. Your face is always painted in the colors of your national flag. Think clearly what you want to represent and pursue that goal relentlessly.

Along the same lines, you don’t want to pigeon whole yourself as “a good drinker” or “the foreign friend”. Not only will it cause significant harm (short and long-term) to your body (people will be calling you every night to go drinking), but more crucially, to your reputation. You want people to like you and feel close to you, but most importantly, view you as a good (business) person with ideas that are trusted and respected. The alcohol is a liquid. It’s a river. The glass is your boat. Let it carry you to your destination. Do it with good manner and style and get off when you’ve arrived.