Our company is moving offices in a few weeks and our apartment lease is up at the end of the month, so we’re apartment hunting. I’ve lived in three, progressively better places since I first arrived here, but I’ve never been a part of the search process. I started in the Chinese projects (i.e. government owned and assigned) for about a month and a half, which looks and feels like a prison. Then I went to another set of projects, for about 5 months, this one a little bit better, and finally into a residential complex, which is okay. Now I’m gonna splurge….or at least I thought so.

Today we went to look at a place. It was in the projects. Two bedrooms. The guy starts to say we can fit three people in. I’m not sure why he is saying this, because we (two people) said that we are only looking for a place to house two people. Maybe he wants to charge each person less, but altogether more? But it is clearly, clearly a two bedroom apartment. But he wants someone to sleep in the area designed for the dining table. But it’s not enclosed or anything. There’s absolutely no privacy. So my flatmate is trying to say, without sounding too direct, that for younger folks (this guy was probably 40), privacy is a consideration in the decision making process. I just step in and say, with a smile on my face and a slap to his back: “It’s not convenient for nailing chicks”. That’s the rough translation. My flatmate cringed and said, “He’s joking”. The landlord replied, “oh, no, don’t worry, it would be me sleeping there”. He said he wouldn’t be sleeping there everyday, though. But he is married, so I’m not sure why he would need to sleep there? But I did see woman’s shoes and products there. Were we gonna get 2 for 1?

Worst of all is this…he doesn’t want to pay rent or utilities. He wants to sleep for free. This guy has got to be the worst hustler of all time. I’ve had something crazy landlords, but never one like this dude. And I never will. Pass.